The Eightfold Paths of BDSM and Beyond Read online

  But none of those eightfold paths called to me as I was exploring the varieties of sacred exploration we do in BDSM, kink, and adventurous sexuality. Then, an essay by Raven Kaldera came across my desk, The Eightfold Path to Altered States of Consciousness. (See Appendix 2). It struck a chord for me, even if I disagreed with some of the points he made. These notes of internal discord led me to something more valuable than being handed awareness. It made me go fishing for my own awareness. Thus, Raven’s work made me start looking at my own thoughts on the issue.

  In Kaldera’s article, the order the paths that tended to manifest or be encountered within Northern Shamanism were:

  Path of Meditation (a.k.a. Path of Breath)

  Path of Ritual

  Path of Rhythm

  Ascetic’s Path

  Path of Sacred Plants

  Path of the Flesh

  Ordeal Path

  Path of the Horse

  In my own investigations, I have found that these eight major paths to altered states of consciousness appear not just in shamanism or magic as they are often discussed, but in almost every sacred, religious, mystical or esoteric path I have encountered. They just don’t discuss it in this exact language. They see the eight paths through the filter of their own cultural primary path, including Asceticism in the Noble Eightfold Path, Sacred Plants for Dr. Leary’s work. I take a peek at each of these other eight part systems at the end of each Path in turn. There are other paths that are not included in the above eight such as the Path of Madness, by which people obtain enlightenment through mental illness, or the Path of the Thief, by which gnosis or personal power is stolen from another, such as in the tale of Raven stealing the Sun. The large bulk of Sacred Kink experiences can be broken down into those eight paths, or in “Blended Paths” that combine major elements of each.

  Altered States of Consciousness

  Before we dive into each of the different paths, I think it is important to look at what an altered state of consciousness is, why we go into them, and what we do once we are there.

  An altered state of consciousness (ASC, also known as “altered states of awareness,” or simply an “altered state”) is a state of consciousness that differs significantly from the baseline or normal consciousness. It is argued that an ASC is traceable by looking at the brain waves or brain states of the person experiencing them, but EEGs and MRIs are imperfect tools for such things: sneezing, coughing, being in a coma, and thinking about the color red will register as non-normative brain waves, as brain waves are what are registered by such machines.

  Altered states can come about accidentally through such things as traumatic accidents, fever, meningitis, sleep deprivation, deep diving, and oxygen deprivation. Most of us have also experienced moments where we have missed an exit on the freeway or lost time because we were petting cute kittens (kitten trance), both forms of accidental ASC. But in the case of Sacred Kink, using altered states deliberately is of far more interest than those accidental states.

  What is a baseline or normal brain state? “Baseline” or “normal” can be defined as having both a psychological sense of self, and that sense of self is identified with one’s body. Thus there are two major categories of altered states of consciousness: those where we lose connection with our own body or perceptions, and those where we lose our sense of self-identity (going into nothingness, universal oneness, not being being “ourselves” any more, etc). There are other states of consciousness such as “being in the zone,” hyper-focus, and more.

  Every single path laid out here is a different route along the journey to altered states, a different way to reach the top of the mountain or the bottom of the well. But the real question is not how we get there, but why we want to get there in the first place.

  Why the Quest?

  Each person has their own reason for wanting to go into altered states of consciousness, but the overarching reasons can be broken down into a number of general categories. Understanding the reason why you or someone you are negotiating with wants to enter an altered state of consciousness will help everyone makes decisions involving how to explore Sacred Kink. Which Path should you take? What activities, kink or otherwise, do you want to engage in? How much investment will each person devote to the work? What is their perspective on the work?

  “Ritual S/M is edge play directed to the purpose of attaining altered states of consciousness, of traveling beyond our habitual perceptual screens to another way of being in which everything becomes special, extraordinary, brilliant. Goals for such a scene might be a quest for guidance, or a vision, the pursuit of personal truth or understanding, or the experience of spiritual communion for its own sake”

  - Dossie Easton and Catherine Liszt, The Topping Book

  By learning what we and our partners are looking for when exploring altered states of consciousness, we can also help craft the types of Sacred Kink explorations we want to go on together.

  Good Times

  That’s right! Some people enjoy exploring altered states because it’s enjoyable. That’s okay. In fact, for many of us, it’s more than okay. Enjoying life is part of living. There are many ways and reasons to have a good time with ASCs.

  These include:

  Relaxation

  Hyper-focus on a sensation or experience

  Reaching Sub or Top space

  Fully engaging our neural network

  Having personal permission to feel emotions and sensations fully

  Enjoying a wild ride

  How many of us don’t get enough of that in our lives? The opportunity to lean back in a lover’s arms, or drift off into nothingness and finally let our shoulders drop can literally be a lifesaver for the over-worked and over-taxed. For those that tend to go through life without direction or drive, altered states can provide the opportunity to focus all of life into the experience of a hand brushing along our thigh or a lash landing on our skin.

  Both of these directions, along with a bevy of other descriptions (many of which you will see listed below), also fit into the categories of “Sub space” and “Top space” in the world of BDSM. Sub space describes the altered states that a Bottom (receptive partner), Submissive (submitting partner), or Slave (serving or dedicated partner) goes into when they are fully experiencing their receptive, submitting, or serving nature. Top space describes when a Top (giving partner), Dominant (willful partner), or Master/Mistress (authoritative partner) goes into when they are fully experiencing their giving, willing or authoritative nature. This journey can be profound, but it can also be considered for some a form of good times.

  One of the reasons that so many of us are attracted to altered states is because it is an opportunity to engage our neural networks in ways we usually do not. Our brain takes in two to twenty million bits of information a second, and yet our active mind processes only eight to thirty of those pieces of information (depending on whose study you read). It’s why we do not tend to notice the temperature around us, the clothes we are wearing, or how fast our heart is beating unless they become outside the norm. By engaging our neural networks fully we can be present and notice things that usually elude us, which can be enjoyable.

  And yes, it’s a fun ride. Sometimes, doing these things just to do them is a way to live life, feel something new, and not be bored with the journey.

  Stepping Away from the World

  Living in this world can be hard. For those of us living with fibromyalgia, multiple sclerosis, or numerous other painful body experiences, it’s not about when we get to choose pain like other people engaged in BDSM and Kink—we live with pain every day. For those who live with mental or social challenges, these tools provide an opportunity to tap into other routes for self-focus, self-expression, and connecting with ourselves and others. The difference between these unchosen experiences and the activities of Kink that have been consented to is just that—consent.

  Altered states of consciousness can be an option for stepping away from our bodies or the wo
rld. These tools have been employed for millennia, before there was anesthesia to allow for surgery and other medical practices to take place. In addition, harnessing altered states allows for those who need to endure pain for other reasons, such as pushing themselves to more extreme levels, trials of innocence in traditional cultures, etc.

  Having the opportunity to step out of ourselves can also allow us to control our experiences by not having our experiences control us. Whether we are conflicted, have broken our leg, or are suffering from loss, bearing witness to our journey can allow for perspective that we might not otherwise have. Classic therapy tools such as breathing through the pain to then look “down” on the pain are a basic example of using the Path of Breath for just this sort of work.

  Complete detachment from the world (known as Kaivalya in Hinduism and Jhana in Buddhism) is this concept taken to a lifestyle level. Instead of bearing witness to one moment by being in an altered state, the practitioner removes themselves from the cycle of suffering and pain while still living by remaining aware of the experiences learned by bearing witness in an altered state.

  Connection to a Partner

  For some of us, altered states provide an opportunity to connect with partners, lovers, friends, and family (by birth or by choice) in different ways. This might be a depth found in shared experience, a connection between souls, or an expression of love brought about by literally being in a different state of mind. Trust can be built by one individual helping create the experience for the other, or by going on the journey together. Be forewarned—sometimes this reason for engaging in an altered state needs additional negotiation and finesse. Unless all involved are there for that reason, misunderstandings and hard feelings can arise.

  Within Kink, the use of altered states can allow for exploring erotic control as well as dominance and submission. Especially for those who are interested in surrender, not just submission, stepping out of our day-to-day mind is the only way to fully give in to our desires. We have been taught that egalitarian relationships are the only way to love and thrive. These journeys into different relationship styles provide an opportunity in such cases to turn over leaves of the soul that might otherwise be obscured, showing the depth and power available through such exchanges.

  Exchanges also take place between individuals in the form of energetic feeding or transference. Whether referred to as psychic vampirism, refilling of chi through personal connection, or some similar act or experience, altered states can allow for this passing of energy and power from one person to another. Either the giving or the receiving partner may find it necessary to engage in an altered state to get this need or interest met. This practice is one where I encourage full disclosure, as the giving partner needs an opportunity to consent to such activities, and the receiving partner has the possibility of creating bonds of attachment that need to be thought out.

  Seeking Change, Healing, and Personal Identity Work

  We can be our own obstacles for creating change in our lives. By allowing us to approach thoughts from a different perspective, altered states allow an opportunity to get out of our own way. Whether we are examining our own Ego, Superego or Id from a detached place, or opening up locked or concealed thoughts and feelings from our past or present, this has the potential for truly life changing work. But be forewarned: it is work. Sometimes, in opening up the locked closets of our memory or emotions, we may find thoughts and feelings long-forgotten. They are likely to take time and energy to process and understand.

  Beyond looking at ourselves, altered states can also allow us the opportunity to literally reprogram our identity and being, examining past wounds, assumptions and habits. If we find something there we need to face, we open up the ability to rearrange our own internal furniture. This is not to be taken lightly. Moving a couch is one thing, knocking down walls in our psyche is another.

  By forging the soul in the fire of our being, known as “Distilling the Gold of our Spirit” in Hermetic practices, we have the power to change our resonance and vibration of being. Altered states have been used for years by hypnotists and some forms of therapy, as well as by shamans, priests and mystics to help individuals overcome feelings such as fear, trepidation, paranoia, shyness, or social conditioning, to face taboos, or do seemingly simple things like stop smoking.

  This often works better when in an altered state, because what is said by the Guide, hypnotist, shaman or priest has the ability to reach a deeper core level and be heard more by the brain of the Seeker or Journeyer. This can be positive, such as when someone wants to stop smoking and is ready to do the work but just needs to be encouraged. It can also be potentially negative, when a Guide says something argumentative or purposefully hurtful to the open and waiting mind.

  These tools have been used by tribal cultures, the military and frat boys alike to create initiatory experiences where a person is left no longer the same, inside or out, afterwards. They have also been used by mental health facilities, prisons, religious interrogators and individuals to create a space for atonement for past wrongs (real or perceived), allowing the individual to move on in life with a clear conscience.

  Astral/Energetic Work

  Whether you experience it as going into your own subconscious and tapping into your personal truths, or as journeying out of the body to other parts of reality and bringing back knowledge and wisdom, astral and energetic work using altered states can have a variety of outcomes. For some people this is part of the “good times” category. For others this is a profound experience that can change a life or be part of a regular spiritual practice.

  Entering an altered state has the potential to create the ability in waking time or normal reality to palpably feel and experience vibrational fields, energy and auras, or see non-corporeal beings such as spirits, ghosts, and other entities. For others, being in that altered state is the only way to have those experiences. For shamanic practitioners, astral work allows for such activities as recovering lost pieces of their own soul or that of a client. For ceremonial magicians, astral journeying can lead to finding information that enables spell-working.

  For individuals living with bodies that do not match their interior experience of themselves, astral journeying has the potential to allow them to spend time as their true selves. Whether transgendered, transsexual, intersex, vampiric, therian, otherkin, physically disabled or otherwise, this can be a gift beyond value. In addition, for individuals wanting to explore the potentials of their astral body, altered states can help enable them get to the “other side” of their own existence, and spend time exploring what it is like to take on transformations of their being, from becoming their ideal human self, to being a tree or disembodied being.

  There are also those who use altered states to do energetic work such as collecting chi, prana, energy or life force from the world around them. By connecting to the ambient energy, city life, sacred sites or open land, they can “feed” themselves. Whether they are charging a spell, healing an injury, or making up some need in themselves, this can be useful for some, but inappropriate for others. When feeding off of people, for example, there are those who almost get energetically addicted to specific places or situations. This is even more true for those who feed off of individual people or dramatic situations. It is important to gain permission or paid some energetic fee to do so, and only take what is needed at that time.

  Connection with a Divine force or the Universe

  Whether it is called Goddess, God, the Universe, Great Cosmic Muffin, greater will, the divine power(s), spirit, or Maker, many individuals have experienced or long to experience a connection with a higher power or consciousness. Almost all forms of connecting with the divine are enabled or deepened by altered states. This can be as simple as getting that tingle from knowing that the divine exists and you know it in your skin, to something like erotic connections directly with deities and universal will.

  Known as Ifran in Islam, there is the connection with the intimate knowledge of
the universe. When going for specific information that the universe-at-large holds, this is sometimes referred to as accessing the Akashic Records. Sometimes gaining knowledge with a divine source can involve making deals or coming to arrangements with spirits, deities and other beings, all of which are facilitated by some form of altered state.

  Becoming part of the Universe on a deeper level is also a recurring theme brought about by altered states throughout world faith. Chassidic schools of Judaism refer to “being absorbed into God’s Infinite Light,” while Union with God is a theme known as Theosis in Christianity, Henosis in Neoplatonism, and Brahma-Nirvana in Hinduism. Meanwhile, Te in Taoism and Satori in Mahayana Buddhism both speak of the intrinsic connection to the world-as- a-whole.

  But for some of us, the knowledge of the divine can be found using altered states of consciousness within the confines of ourselves. Feri practitioner T. Thorne Coyle refers to the work of Self-Possession, drawing down one’s own archangel or divine spark that is part of our soul to find out what the Self has to say. This can come in a less esoteric but no less profound way in the form of the epiphany, when knowledge that we intrinsically knew all along “suddenly” jumps into crystal clarity, usually through having experienced some form of altered state of consciousness. We can also have experiences where in the silence of letting the world fall away, we give ourselves permission to actually hear what our unconscious mind has been trying to tell us all along.